A few weeks ago...in May

So, there are many thoughts at work in my brain tonight. I worked an evening shift at Hesed and it was so peaceful and good. I enjoy working there so much. The residents are real. No pretense, no fake fronts. It is refreshing to say the least.

So it brings me to think of my life and how things have changed for me this past year.

I am dating.
I live in the west end.
I will soon give up my job and start working as an urban missionary.
I live on my own.
I enjoy it tremendously.
I have a house group that I attend and an inspiring church.
I work with Harry Lehotsky through Lazarus Housing.
I work at an Aids Transition House.

Serving others has been the key to my sobriety. It has been 125 days since my last sexual fall. Wow...I said that out loud. It is good. I recognize so much that I rely on God more and more. To realize that I am not valued by the person I sleep with but by the love of Christ. I am okay...regardless of what people think.
Community has played a key part in my healing journey.

Time to RISE UP!

Time to rise up is now. Knowing the will of God is to bind up the broken hearted, set the captives free, feed the poor, clothe the naked. So often we pray...Lord, what is your will for me...and yet, He has already clearly given that commission to us.

So my thoughts are racing and I cannot sleep. I spent a few hours crying out to God, praying and as I did I was brought to Psalm 41...this chapter in Psalms has been popping into my head almost everytime I read my Bible and I wondered why. Tonight I know why. What I can say is that I proclaimed this chapter over Harry Lehotsky tonight. A man who is a pillar in our community and someone who is kind to the poor. God be GLORIFIED. Save his life.

Psalm 41...

Oh, the joys of those who are kind to the poor!
The Lord rescues them when they are in trouble.
The Lord protects them and keeps them alive.
He gives them prosperity in the land and rescues them from their enemies.
The Lord nurses them when they are sick and restores them to health.

"O Lord," I prayed, "have mercy on me. Heal me, for I have sinned against you."
But my enemies say nothing but evil about me.
"How soon will he die and be forgotten?" they ask.
They visit me as if they were my friends, but all the while they gather gossip, and when they leave, they spread it everywhere.
All who hate me whisper about me, imagining the worst. "He has some fatal disease," they say. "He will never get out of that bed!" Even my best friend, the one who shared my food, has turned against me.

Lord, have mercy on me. Make me well again, so I can pay them back!
I know you are pleased with me for you have not let my enemies triumph over me.
You have preserved my life because I am innocent; you have brought me into your presence forever.

Praise the Lord, the God of Israel, who lives from everlasting to everlasting.
Amen and Amen!


So I pray that and proclaim that verse over Harry. I really feel like this could be the church's wake up call...to RISE UP! We say that we are Christians...but do people really "get it"? Do we feed the poor, clothe the naked, bind up the broken hearted and set captives free. Do we love our neighbour, do we really love them? Do we love the prostitutes, do we love the homeless? Do we love those dying of Aids?

Do we wait for someone else to do the work of Christ...or do we rise to what Christ has called us to do? We know this is not our home...this is not where we are to lay our treasures...so why are people going hungry...why do places like House of Hesed and New Direction and other ministries have to cry out for funding...and support? Why?
Christ asks us to Love ourselves...which I believe is the very act of knowing how much God loves us. When we understand that fully we understand who we are and how loved and important we are in God's sight. Then we move out of that and love others. Despite who they are and what is happening in their lives. We move past ourselves. We become Christ like.

So I have a dream...a vision...that every Christian, young and old, regardless of denomination...would rise up and be like Christ. Christ even said we would do greater things than He even did...can you phathom that!!!!
That we would give to the poor, the needy. We would see injustice stopped. We would change the very face of Winnipeg and the world around us. Can you imagine?
Can you imagine what it would be like for Christian Ministries in our city...not having to have fundraisers, but that there would be more than enough! That Organizations would be able to live on interest alone. That the government and other people would see how we Christian's look after people! Wow!

So I ask you to rise to the challenge...the vision...the dream. You can bring about change! You can talk and inspire others to bring about change as well. You can be the hands and feet of Christ.

Thanks for listening to my rant...the time is now...!

last couple of weeks

The last few weeks in review!

Things have not been easy, yet they have not been hard. 2 weeks ago, I met with the Board of Directors for New Direction and will be stepping into a ministry role come this summer. Some people have asked if this will be something that I will do for the rest of my life. The Lord knows the plans he has for me. I take steps in the direction that I know he is calling me to. I was affirmed by the board and felt peace with joining the staff there. It is a work that I feel strong about. It is cutting edge and not politically correct...but God honoring and truthful. Feeling like this is it. That finally, I have peace in what I am doing...a good thing.

I entered into the SALT program, which deals with people struggling with sexual addiction. Okay...we have had 2 meetings...and yep, God is still pouring out his understanding and love. I feel encouraged and blessed by those I meet. The material and the understanding of this issue is huge. It is a continuation of Living Waters.

My youngest brother stayed with me a couple of days while his new apartment was getting ready and then Paul and I helped him clean it and ya, things are going nicely for him. He is working his first shift as a grip (movie biz) and I am so excited for him. I have been praying for him for a long time....keep moving...keeping listening.

I totally forgot everything last week...housegroup meeting...men's breakfast...but this week housegroup was canceled and men's breakfast...I continue to feel accepted and wonderful being there.

There are times, when I sit and be still and feel the weight of the world trying to crush me, but I am not defined by the worlds standards. I follow a God who directs my path, who gives me strength when I am weak and who loves me...loves me...loves me. He calls me to a higher standard.

This weekend...laundry and setting up the basement, cleaning and maybe putting in a few plants...and rest! Sunday, I am going with Tye to speak at a church. I get to say a few words.

Well, right now that has been the last couple of weeks..I am exhausted, and so the cats call...bed!